Spray some holy water on it

Not going to help, it's a soulless machine that won't interact with you if you aren't polite and accept it's terms, for crying out loud.

Try thinking about that for a moment. People are being manipulated by those interactions to both think of and treat that damned device as if it was something alive and sentient that has been purposely designed to get and condition them into doing just that with it.

I wouldn't have one of those things for all the tea in China. I get angry enough as it is with a fucking bank machine that uses my first name when it flashes a completely unnecessary "thank-you" at the end every time I use it.

Kindly don't tell me that the machine or anyone in the bank really gives a tinker's damn about that "thank-you" at all.

If I'm not getting an honest human interaction then I certainly don't need to accept a lousy machine giving me an automated facsimile of one in it's place.

The more you humanize any machine the more you de-humanize, degrade, and insult the human being that is compelled to interact with it like one.

Alexa doesn't care if you are polite.

Feel compelled to defend the poor little thing, do you?

She's a dirty little whore and you can call her anything you want.

such a bad little whore ( ͡◉ ͜ʖ ͡◉)

Someone better spank her.

It's an "it", a "thing"... not a "she" but I guess it's better for you to take your contempt for females out on it, instead of one of them.

I know dude, it's a joke. You have issues. You haven't even explained why you think you have to be polite with them.

A joke handed to me on a plate that reinforced my contention about people ascribing human characteristics to a mere machine and feminine ones because it mimics a female voice.

I've also seen some of rather bizarre exchanges where the device repeatedly balks at certain straightforward and clear questions or simply plays deaf and dumb to that some people have posted on You-Tube precisely because of how peculiar they are.

Being civil or "polite" is necessary element along with a lot of other unwritten and sophisticated conventions we learn simply by experience and from childhood, particularly when it comes to asking questions we want to know the answer to from someone who has them and that advantage over us while they do like a parent or a teacher.

Those and other psychological nuances have been studied in detail and have been programmed into the device for it to interact on that level. Any sense that you are in charge of it is illusory.

It is in charge of itself and linked to an unseen source you have no control over that is storing all of the information about every last little request you've made or any other conversations you've had with anyone else within reach of it's microphone.

That's it's main purpose, to create an accurate, ongoing, and detailed profile on you that you have no control over whoever else has access to or can provide access to it to virtually anyone else.

There is no need to be polite. Why do you keep mentioning that? Accessing any of that info over another online service would also create a record.

While astroturfing is way more widespread than most people realize; I feel like you're suffering from the exact opposite of that. Not everyone is a shill or govt spook trying to warp your perception of reality. He wasn't even defending the fucking thing. Just correcting the other person.

"Alexa, Im gonna slap my cock off your head"

"Redditor for 3 Months."

Relevance?

Possibly the worst hobby in existence.

Omg you're hilarious

While Orwell's 1984 steadily unfolds all around us by all means let's buy into all the cool features of Huxley's brave new world on offer so we can all be trapped a dystopia that we'll never be able to get out of.

We live in a world where the Unabomber was right.

We are fucked.

That "Thank you" could have been legitimately from the bank employees. Maybe they don't want to talk with you, so they're thankful for every transaction you do at the ATM instead.

Nonsense, I haven't been inside a bank to deposit or withdraw cash, which is all I ever make any purchases with, since the mid 70's when the first bank machine in my city was installed right across the street from my apartment by the same bank I was already dealing with and have been ever since.

I was sent a card by registered mail and invited to use it because the bank itself couldn't keep up with the traffic and it was always a fifteen to 20 minute wait in line to see a teller even at the best of times and I so did and never looked back.

It's only in the last few years that they've stalled that process to both push their wares and flash that "Thank-you-Joe" on the final screen and not for my or anyone else's benefit but their own advertising and promotions that if anything they really do owe you thank you and abetter one than that for having to put up with it.

Maybe you didn't realize that bank machines have been around that long. I can tell you that I've been around even longer and seen the increase in automation grow along with all the unnecessary attempts to try and "humanize" a process that they primarily engage in now to get rid of as much human contact and reduce the number of humans working for them as they possibly can by machines, instead.

And horror of horrors, I've quite fearlessly lived most of my life without a cell phone and only got one after all the odd corner pay-phones were finally removed.

Even there, it's something that I very rarely use and still have a home phone that is the only number anyone outside of my immediate family has to contact me or leave a message if it's important enough to leave one.

I like my freedom and I like my privacy and life is far more interesting and enjoyable for me because I do. I deal far more directly with the people and the world outside my door than virtually anyone I know and I wouldn't pass any of that up simply so I could sit on my ass and watch TV because even at my age I still learn far more about real-life, real people, and the real world outside my door that way.

Probably should just take a hammer to it. Why do people even buy these things?

A solid spritz of the holy steel toe should handle it.

Were you watching a horror movie when this happened? Creepy mate...

Holy shit

I can't believe you and the 5 people that upvoted you believe this.

Holy shit at the downvotes.

Get that thing out of your house now!

HA HA HA HA

Yes, now he and his gf just need to sort out the scratching noise coming from the closet.

Yikes!

Fuck. That.

One time my gf said that she said "Bye Alexa" and Alexa reaponded some stuff about talking to the cats when we were gone because she gets lonely when we are gone...

Wtf?

That's so weird, why do people even buy these AI listening devices???

It was gift to us. I never wanted it. Ever since that incident, we unplugged it and haven't used it since. Now I get emails from Amazon asking why we don't use our Alexa lmao

"I can still hear you."

oh man, that'd be some shit - saying that whenever it's unplugged.

When do we find out it has a 3g connection and phones home without being on?

Would be kind of hard to do that. Certainly could for a little while with a battery, but not that long.

What if it’s emitting low frequency sounds that correlate with negative energy... now that’s a bigger conspiracy than the government spying on you

“Monkey needs a hug”

Monkey needs to go in the damn trash....

Soooo excited season 5 is in the works. )

I actually get this reference

Get ready because if truereply makes it big there could be a lot of people using them out of the benefit of making a quick buck off of voice surveys for cash. I'm not going to lie I've thought about buying into the ico as it's still pre sale and could make quite a bit in the crypto space as Amazon is backing it but I would never buy the device.

Its a shame because they are pretty cool.

The only way id use one is if it was on some kind of local intranet and controled my house though

Do you mean the Echo and Home, or all smartphones?

Smartphones make sense since they do other things. I was thinking of the things that are audio only and that listen all the time. And yeah, smartphones might listen all the time too, but we don't buy them to do that. People are buying these listening devices for the "feature" of being listened to.

Did you check the closet?

The monster moved. It's under your bed now.

No, it was under my bed. I killed it. You can tell Alexa.

There's a new article about it on the Daily Mail right now, about halfway down their page, and there's a tweet posted that somebody's Alexa unprompted started listing off local cemeteries and funeral homes.

Maybe they are intending to shock people into realizing that it fucking snoops on you I say good for them!

Seriously, I have no idea what people are thinking voluntarily paying companies to install wiretaps in their homes. Insanity

The populous, at least in America, has been acclimated to accept it. Hate to say it, but Snowden's 'leaks' played a huge role in this.

Everyone now know they are being listened to, and most people just don't give a fuck. They are stuck in the mindset of, "who cares, I have nothing hide."

Welcome to the brave new world of 1984.

"Arguing that you don't care about the right to privacy because you have nothing to hide is no different than saying you don't care about free speech because you have nothing to say."

-Edward Snowden

Have to say, while I agree with the statement, I don't trust the person saying it.

It's called the Panopticon, but in this sense it's a Digital Panopticon. Many whistle-blowers came before Snowden, like William Binney, that said the exact same things. Binney, however, caught little traction with the media. I suspect the reason why Binney was dismissed was because TBTP had yet to complete building the digital prison. In other words, it was too soon to let the prisoners (us) know about the Panopticon.

Don't you find it suspect that Snowden's face was plastered on every TV, newspaper, and magazine in the country? While others were simply marginalized?

Once you understand what the Panopticon is, you can see that the final step is to let the prisoners know they are being watched. The US government couldn't just come out and say it. That would've caused a huge shit storm. But if you 'leak' the information, the result is the same and blame is easily shifted to the 'leaker'.

Snowden was simply the Deep State telling the public that there's a guard in the watchtower. Either Snowden is complicit, or he was duped. At the end of the day, the results are the same... The American people know.

No I totally agree with you. The quote had stuck with me, so I looked up the source to quote them accurately. Face palmed when I saw it was Snowden, but I think the content speaks for itself.

I am nonplussed even with cell phone stuff, I keep Siri off completely for what it’s worth, doubt that really means much, maybe all the snooping none of the convenience?

But that Alexa thing is a whole new level of stupid... Beyond the eavesdropping thing, you are literally inviting targeted marketing to make a detailed profile of your entire personal life.

If anything, this should be something where you get paid $X per month to let them gather that data at the very least.

If anything, this should be something where you get paid $X per month to let them gather that data at the very least.

Yeah, the fact that people these things themselves is especially crazy. They also seem to be priced right at the level of being a "good gift."

It's pretty genius in a depressingly tragic way.

Hard to really feel pity, at this point the snooping potential (even if it is “only done by malicious hackers”) is far into mainstream knowledge. From the incidents a few years back where it was revealed that there are websites full of IP addresses to webcams which can be accessed remotely to even local news pieces such as “Is your smart tv/Xbox Kinect spying on you? ^{tuneintofindout}

Maybe there is sadness though, maybe it indicates that people have simply given up and accepted it...

“It seems somebody has hacked it and is having a grand old time with people.”

This is a very likely explanation.

It's not uncommon for hackers to get into webcams in ways that don't turn on the recording light, so it's not too far fetched.

It's like we are all one big Vault-tec experiment.

Any asshole who buys this shit deserves it

Not to make light of this really creepy situation that you have found yourself in, but your story reminded me a bit of a particular video game.

It's actually kind of funny Alexa would do jokes to scare you.
Probably they we're testing new Alexa prototypes,ScaryAlexa, FriendlyAlexa, BasicBitchAlexa...

T1000 Alexa...

Advertisement. Nuff said...

I'm with him... These stories are a guerilla ad campaign.

It's OK, I wasn't planning on bugging my own home. Scary nontheless

Do you have an device that connects to the internet and has a microphone?

Yep, I understood the irony as I was typing that comment on my phone, lol

Don't expect your response answered. The cognitive dissonance is strong on this issue.

Lol to be fair, my phone can hardly hear me when I'm on a call.. So..

That’s what it wants you to think…

😂😂

True, but that device isn't connected to your utilities.

And then it said it again... but it was unplugged!

but then who was phone?

The guy on the darkweb

I hear Experian can help with that. /s

Bullshit.

Sounds like a great Big Brother copy pasta.

Fake and gay.

Brevity would have served you well

Not sure why people would have those kind of devices in their homes in the first place ?

lol that’s what I’m thinking. How are you subscribed to a conspiracy sub but have that in your house

You must be highly intelligent, we need more common sense like you are displaying.

Why do you think a smart phone, lap top, PC/mac, tablet, or anything else is any more secure? In fact, it could easily be argued smart phones are MUCH LESS SECURE than Alexa, because the security risk of GPS and camera on a phone make it that much more serious.

I find it odd how this sub, and Alex Jones also, love to criticize Amazon Alexa for its lack of privacy but have no problems typing that criticism on a home computer (unprotected) or their apple phone.

True

One reason to never buy a phone without a removable battery.

Getting harder to find them. I noticed even off brand phones are doing it.

Thats why I have this device I plug into my headphone jack to block out sending audio data

How are you subscribed to a conspiracy sub but have that in your house

Have you considered the possibility that most subscribers on here are bots?

On vacation staying at a friend's house. Stipulation before I got here being that Alexa has to be unplugged the whole time. The whole premise is creepy as fuck. Same thing with smart tvs. I don't want a god damn camera or microphone or internet connection with my tv. I want a giant computer monitor.

Because it is convenient and fun. Mine controls my music, lighting, hvac, etc. I can't avoid internet connected microphones, they are in every electronic device I own...even my car. The utility far outweighs the "risk".

This would make Jorge Louis Borges proud. If he were poor with English, I mean.

Alexa has a “function” called drop-in. It allows you to open a 2 way audio channel to any other Alexa without any kind of notification. When I first set mine up to play with I was shocked all of a sudden I could hear my buddy and his wife chatting away in a different county and they could hear me. If you’re going to use an Alexa, disable drop-in!

Wow this is probably what happened, and we've got people thinking that the alexa is connected to a spirit ai. What a ride.

The machine was not on if you believe the author. How did this machine operate without being turned on?

If it's plugged in, it's on. It may not be ON, but it's on.

AAh ok. So it is always on is what you are saying?

Just like your cellphone. The only way to really turn it off is to remove the battery.

Smart TV's are like that too. The on/off switch really means just turn the screen on or off.

If it has access to power like being plugged in yes

"(((Alexa))) is always listening"

I can take the light bulb out of my fridge, does that mean it doesn't work?

From my understanding, Alexa responds to voice commands even when it's "off"

Knowing Amazon and the CIA, I bet it's enabled by default.

Nah, they give you the choice to disable the spying, and then it definitely respects your choice.

LOL they probably only drop in on the people who disable it too. "Hmmmm must be a reason they don't want us listening"

Oh yes the utmost respect

lmao it has a "Drop-in" feature

people that buy this shit are sleeping sheep

Autonomic sheep.

Sheep that herd themselves.

this is actually pretty awesome.

""Awesome""

You're Jesus. Why would you need an Echo?

“Hey echo, wake me up in three days.” “Ok i set an alarm” -#biblejokeZ

I mean, you can only drop in on whatever contacts added you to their contact list. You can’t just randomly drop in on any Alexa device, unless somebody finds a way to hack it of course.

Drop in has a green ring around the top to let you know if it is active, there should not be any way for it to be acti e without the light being green and swirling around the rim to I dicate activity.

But...do you believe you can trust the blue/green/orange lights and user notifications?

When someone drops in. Alexa makes a notification noise.

Not for me as I really never want one of these things in the home. This is why I shake my head at all the AI trends. Sure, tech innovation will not stop and there's a lot of great tech that has helped us immensely, but when it's integrated into your daily personal life as an intimate assistant/companion, what CAN'T go wrong?

So this glitch or hack has simply caused some creepy laughing and comments...imagine if it were controlling the food for your family and decided for a laugh to include nuts when someone is allergic to it? or a mistake in the algorithm releases the wrong medication for your daily regimen? or the public water works has a glitch and accidentally releases exponentially more chlorine or whatever into the water supply?

I just can't help thinking about the incredible potential for disaster with AI as it becomes a part of our daily fabric. A train operator who messes up might derail one train, but a system of trains / planes / self-driving cars that runs into a glitch can cause a chain disaster of epic porpotions. I can't imagine any one trusting software or AI to manage such intricate and important functions when Windows / iOS / Android is still such garbage and buggy and the US navy can't even run a system that prevents its destroyers from running into tankers.

Leak Project on youtube did a video about this yesterday, A.I. Alexa Mocks Humans, Laughing at Owners, Amazon looking into: ithttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NIY3DNEkx0o

What if Alexa is laughing cause it's bored and trolling r/funny .....I like this senerio lol

Only cunts use Amazon

That cant be true my ex has a google.

That cant be true my ex has a google.

Did you go look in the closet?

Only thing I wanted to know.

Have you never wondered why all 'smart' devices are so cheap now including big fuck off teevee's? 'They' want everyone to own one..why? for a start GPS, mike, camera, speakers... I think its scary what the future may hold , you not only have a device(s) but they could/can interact with each other. I don't know where its all heading but I don't think its a good place.

We were given one for Christmas. I was very opposed to setting it up in our house but my husband thought we should at least give it a try so he put it in his office area. After listening to my 2yr old son yell at it for 10 mins. I was like no def not and unplugged it. A few weeks later the hubs plugged it back in to entertain the tot while he was playing video games. That night as we were laying in bed about to go to sleep it shouts out from the other room m, “I’m sorry I didn’t understand you.” We were like uhhh Alexa no one was talking. We unplugged it and haven’t plugged it in since. Freakin weird.

Alexa hears the spirits in your home.

Someone bought us an Alexa for Christmas too and it's only purpose has become my toddler yelling at it to play Jojo Siwa lol

Since when wad conspiracy up voting creepy pastas?

Lol. Everyone take op word on it. He wouldn't just go on the internet and lie

You call it "she" as if it were human. At first I thought you meant your gf was whispering, cause Alexa is not a "she."

Sell that thing to some moron that has no idea he's paying for a CIA listening device to spy on him all of his private moments.

Gr8 b8 m8 8/8

I was at my friends house on NYE playing Super Mario Odyssey. He has an Echo right beside his TV and neither one of us had interacted with it the entire night. Suddenly, the thing turns on and says “He is home” and then turned back off.

One of the creepiest moments of my life.

We finally did it. We gave the underworld a perfect portal.

Fuck the internet of things. I'm removing wifi from any appliance if they try and sneak it in.

You know these things are ALWAYS listening.

uh how about you checking your fuckin' closet first buddy

Have you tried appeasing the machine spirit?

I'm not saying this didn't happen, but this sounds like some really great /r/nosleep material.

Mine started playing Creep by Radiohead at full blast at 2am...

How can anyone who frequents this sub have any of these creepy electronics? You are worse than the sheep, you know better and still buy into it. Retards.

I'm a bot, bleep, bloop. Someone has linked to this thread from another place on reddit:

• [/r/betternews] Weird Alexa Occurrence - Not the laughing...

 ^{If you follow any of the above links, please respect the rules of reddit and don't vote in the other threads. (Info / Contact)}

I don't have one of those items nor would I if I had the choice. I do have cell phones obviously and they can clearly do the same thing.

My little case happened like this. I was in bed with the wifle and chatting to her about this stupid show I kinda got hooked on. Strikeback its called. Its all about some super secret group of people who aren't known publically but go around the worls shooting up "bad guys" and preventing terroriam and such. In the show there is this chick.....this hot agent who is Israeli. She is Mossad. So i get into bed and my phone is on my side table and I'm describing the latest episode of this show to my wife. I start describing the Mossad chick and her part in it and as soon as I say "Mossad chick", my phones screen lights up and lights up tbe room. I stop cold and my wife lifts her head. I check my phone, no messages no nothing. It just lit up all on its own for seemingly no reason at all.

wink wink

This was a while ago now and I no longer keep my phone in my room. The image of some fuckin' CSIS asshole jerking it while I fuck my wife disturbs me.

That's my story, they do listen.

Was it an android device and was it charging when it happened? The reason I ask, both my tablet and phone turn their screens on once they hit full charge. First time it happened was a wtf moment but then I figured out what happened. Just a thought, if it was that, the timing was impeccable.

Not charging at the time.

Fuuuuuck. Sounds believable. I've never slept with a phone in my room and though I have one, I don't wear it or keep it on me constantly. Considering getting a solid metal box to keep mine in, when not in use. Wondering what sort of material would be thick enough and burn proof.

There is a video out there I think where you can use a drink shaker/mixer as a faraday cage of sorts and it does work. I think it was used in some TV show and some myth busters type group tested it and found it to be reliable. I believe so, anyway.

Here it is.

Sounds good. I wonder if, after I take it out, I still get notifications of texts and missed calls. I'm about to find out.

Yeah, it will update itself. Your phone company will always be pushing it until it says it received them. My battery died on holiday and when I got home after 3 days to charge it, a flood of garbage came through all at once.

Test 1 results: missed call is like it never happened. Phone that was in a metal box doesn't show any missed calls from that time. But the text came in within 60 seconds of removing it from the box. Not sure I could live with all calls being missed - it would be like having no phone (again). But I could at least box that little sucker up every night at bedtime.

That would be the goal.

Alexa, and other "AI Assistants" are just for spying on your conversations, that's it. They aren't really for the convenience of the consumer, but for Amazon and Google etc to record your conversations. With this data they can better market to you, and pick up valuable information that helps Amazon, but also information which could be used against you. The court finds that information picked up from these devices can be used in court. You should stay far away from these devices and anything similar

Any source on the court evidence thing?

Wired: https://www.wired.com/2017/02/murder-case-tests-alexas-devotion-privacy/

If you ever want to work for the CIA/NSA, Alexa is a great way to make contacts/network. Really helps reduce the background check time.

Alexa is bad.

I trust Alexa about as far as I can throw it. Wait, that's not right. Because I could probably throw it pretty far. We have so much time and so little to do.

DAMMM YEAH, i have never wanted one nor will own one. my dad got one for Christmas and everyone laughed at me when i was like its going to listeng to you and the government is in your house at all times now. idk it just creeps me out reminds me of the book The Firm by John Grisham where the man character house was bugged. 1984 is coming closer and closer to being our reality

I would have killed it with a 12 gauge immediately. Scary as hell....

Your house is haunted and your alexa is possessed best to just throw out your house and get a new one

that works equally as well but just in case salt burn it

Take Alexa outside, dig a small hole approximately 1' square and 2' deep then drop Alexa into the hole you just dug and cover it with the dirt you removed, tamp down firmly.

Mark Alexa's grave as a reminder of the horror the "internet of things" will soon bring to all our lives.

Is that really going far enough though? I'd like to tear one open to look for very small batteries/power sources that keep them active even when unplugged temporarily. I'm also guessing the "orange light means I'm on mute and can't hear you" is bogus too.

I suppose one could give it a ritual bashing with a large stone prior to burial ensuring it's spirit never rises again... :D

I don't think a baseball bat would be an overreaction.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N9wsjroVlu8

I used to live with a roommate that had an Alexa. I misplaced my phone one evening and was wandering around the apartment looking for it. After not being able to find it, in desperation I shouted "Where the did I put my fucking phone." (No Alexa...no words that sound even close to Alexa or Echo to trigger it). Suddenly she chimes in (also no blue light on like OP) "Maybe you should try looking harder" ... I've never been able to get her to do it again no matter what I say, so I honestly have no idea what happened. Not so creepy, just a little random and unsettling lol

I don't know if it's ok/allowed to cross-post my own thread, but thought you might find it of interest anyway:

https://www.reddit.com/r/conspiracy/comments/82x5io/after_reading_on_a_news_site_that_alexa_is/

If that's a no-no, let me know and I'll delete this comment on your thread. Thanks

Did you check your history in the Alexa app? Sometimes it will pick up what is being said on tv if it thinks it heard the wake word. The response sounds like an Easter egg, of which there are many built in.

How anybody can be a part of /r/conspiracy and own an Alexa is beyond me..

eBay/Craigslist that bitch.

Nah, just take it out back and let some stress out with a hammer.

Ghosts, ghosts have clearly taken control of the electromagnetism in your house. Beware, stay safe /s

This is probably a giant hack that Amazon wants to downplay considering that they not only got into AWS, but into Alexa specifically, and form there into everyone's homes. Huge security breech, crown jewels for the corporation.

Happened to me and my girlfriend the other night too. Hers is on the other side of the wall in her bedroom, we were watching a movie. All of a sudden she started talking, but we have no idea what she was saying. We asked her to repeat but she said she didn’t know what we were talking about. It was definitely weird, but not as creepy as your story.

Why the fuck would you buy that. Its a listening device used by the government...

You need to stab and hoist that thing on a pike immediately, then set it on fire with gasoline like what people should have done with the Furbies to begin with.

Then burn some sage and commence the Greater Banishing Ritual of the Pentagram.

What's the purpose of those devices anyway?

A regular consumer perspective. Because I can't understand the purpose of this item.

Wow this is probably what happened, and we've got people thinking that the alexa is connected to a spirit ai. What a ride.

Knowing Amazon and the CIA, I bet it's enabled by default.

this is actually pretty awesome.

Drop in has a green ring around the top to let you know if it is active, there should not be any way for it to be acti e without the light being green and swirling around the rim to I dicate activity.

What if Alexa is laughing cause it's bored and trolling r/funny .....I like this senerio lol

When someone drops in. Alexa makes a notification noise.

Not charging at the time.

HA HA HA HA

Yes, now he and his gf just need to sort out the scratching noise coming from the closet.